Coach Ameerah

Coach Ameerah

Pronouns: she/her

Hometown: Bridgetown

Favorite Sport: Rugby (Soccer a close second)

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Ameerah’s journey to becoming a coach at the School of Hard Knocks is one of resilience and transformation. Through her experiences with trauma and determination to help others, Ameerah has inspired young individuals facing their own challenges. Read on to learn more about her background, the hurdles she’s overcome, and the invaluable advice she shares with her students.

Can you tell us about your background and what led you to become a coach at the School of Hard Knocks?

I’m a person who went through a traumatic experience and did not know how to express what had happened to me or how to speak about it. Keeping it in is what destroyed my mental and spiritual well-being, and it almost ended my physical being. At that point, I knew I wanted to make a change in someone’s life, especially from a younger age, so that they can grow up and learn how to cope with challenges and what they need to do to take care of their well-being. I wanted to be there so they can have someone they feel comfortable around to vent to.

What are some of the biggest challenges you've faced as a coach, and how have you overcome them?

Because of my past experiences, I grew to be a shy and isolated person because of my low self-confidence and self-esteem. I never trusted myself enough to put myself out there. Because I doubted myself, I began to see that people also doubted my abilities. I knew that being at the School of Hard Knocks was the environment I wanted to work in because the people in charge care about how you’re doing and coping. I knew I had to make the change and that change starts within me I began to tell myself that I need to step up if I want to help the kids. I needed to trust my abilities, and my determination to be a support structure for the kids is what drove me to overcome my shyness.

How do you prioritize and maintain your own mental health while managing the demands of coaching?

I’ve learned from coaching that you cannot pour from an empty cup. You cannot give your best self to the participants if you are not feeling the best. I prioritise my mental health by taking time out to do self-care routines such as spending time with loved ones, taking time to myself, and reflecting on how far I’ve come and the progress I’ve made, I do the things that I love such as rugby and reconnecting with nature, I also take note of the emotions I’m feeling because I know that if I can’t pinpoint my emotions, I’ll not be able to work through what I’m feeling.

What advice do you give to your students about maintaining their mental health and well-being?

I always reiterate that they cannot be their best selves if they do not take care of themselves. They have to use positive coping mechanisms, such as journaling, creativity, de-stress mechanisms, getting enough exercise, relaxation, and wellness programs.

Want to learn more about our coaches and experiences at School of Hard Knocks? Follow us on Instagram @sokh_sa for all of our coach spotlights, mental health support, and programs!

SoHK is proud to announce it’s combined efforts with The Irish Rugby Team in making a change in the youth of Alexandra. The stars of Ireland have taken a pause from their preparation for the first test against South Africa to team up with SoHK in developing the youth of the Alex Wolves & Queens High rugby clubs through the ‘School of Hard Knocks’ programme that is supported by the Irish Embassy in Pretoria.

Alexandra, Johannesburg

The town of Alexandra, in Johannesburg, is stricken with poverty. Most of its population is underprivileged and live on a day-to-day basis. It is also near to training grounds at which the The Irish Rugby Team are preparing for their first test against South Africa.

The Team-Up

SoHK and The Irish Rugby Team hosted a once-off session where the two U19 teams were brought together to the training grounds of the Irish Rugby team where they enjoyed their time with some fun and games before receiving some tough training from the Irish players. After powering through this task the young players were given the space to find out more about the Irish players and their lives.

One of the youngsters from the township asked, “What do you do when you are feeling down?” Which was a perfect segway to discuss a bit about mental health, without stigma. Many of the players could talk about to how mental health affects them as rugby players and their goals in life. The youngsters could see, that mental health is something that is important and could be spoken about.

Feedback

“The kids can’t stop talking about the event.”

“They aren’t just excited about the Irish that they met but they were also excited about the School of Hard Knocks and what we brought to them as they’ve never had the platform to kind of to speak about this.”

“We and the coaches of the teams feel like the mental health session was really something that they needed but also the whole experience was a great experience for the teams.”

We are beyond proud! It is so well deserved and we are all honoured to work with this special guy, who impacts young lives wherever he goes.

Urshwin Engel, 30, was raised in a community in Cape Town that was rife with gangsterism and gang violence, and it opened his eyes to its danger to society and the effect it has on men. He works as programme lead at an organisation called School of Hard Knocks where he mentors and leads NXTGENMEN, a programme that focuses on men’s mental health and gender-based violence. Here he explores funding opportunities, facilitates programmes, trains other organisations and plans one-day tournaments for men on a monthly basis. Working on NXTGENMEN gives him the opportunity to work with men who have suffered grave difficulties.

He says the programme offers men the opportunity to find their voice and take control of the narrative about men’s character and role in society. Having grown up in a community with gang violence, Urshwin understands that people don’t choose their conditions and often become a victim of their circumstances, and so when more opportunities are created, the better chance they have of making positive choices. He is also involved in Camp Joy, a restoration centre for men with a history of substance abuse and gangsterism, where he coaches a rugby club and teaches boys and men life skills.

Achievements

A project that I am really proud of is the SOHK NXTGENMEN programme. I have been with SoHK for five years and in this time we have started a new project called NXTGENMEN. This programme focuses on men’s mental health, gender-based violence and providing coping strategies for men. I was initially part of the programme as a co-facilitator and later became the project lead.

I have always dreamt of reaching out to our men as I’ve seen the difficulties in our communities and also the struggles that come with being a man growing up in South Africa. I have previously worked in a community that was rife with gangsterism and learnt that people don’t choose their conditions and that society has allowed these negative things to become a part of our norm.

With NXTGENMEN we give men the opportunity to explore their individuality and own voice. While doing this programme, I  learnt that men want to change the narrative, and don’t want to be labelled as “trash” and it has given me hope for a better South Africa.

Mentors

My dad is a pastor and does a lot of community work. Growing up, I would always be by his side and learnt to have a holistic approach to life as my dad never saw status, power, race or religion. He felt that everybody needed support and always did his best to make Cape Town a better place.

Coach CeeJay reflects:

This year was going to be the year where I got my things in order. However, I feel like I haven’t been able to do that. I feel a sense of dissatisfaction with myself even though I know I am trying and the work that I do is important.

The transition that has happened this year for me was moving into a new space. I have been living in the comfort of university residence for the last 5 years. This has been such an extreme transition for me because I was able to get a space where I feel safe and also happen to move in with people who are very welcoming and show a lot of love to each other and me, but it meant that I would far from the things that I was used to. Seeing my friends can be a mission which has led to a sort of distance between us. However, we have been working to make this situation better. This transition has allowed me the chance to learn what it means to be alone, paying rent and just taking care of myself and my family, as an adult. It has helped me to reflect a lot on myself and the kind of person I want the world to see versus the person the world already sees.

So, I am now on that journey of accepting myself but also working on the things that I found needed to be worked on so that I can give the best version of myself to our participants, my friends and family, and myself.

It has been quite a journey. Sometimes, I find myself going back to my old ways but because I know why I’m doing this I always find a way back. Another transition I am experiencing is working on having difficult conversations. In my experience, these types of conversations have led to more harm than good. So, I have been working on that by myself and with my counsellor. It’s still a work in progress.

How has the NextGenWomxn programme helped you?

Being given the opportunity to take the lead in some of the NextGenWomxn (NGW) programmes has been such a wonderful experience because it has brought back my motivation and my confidence in my abilities to not only be a leader but also to take on responsibilities that I sometimes shy away from because I’m scared of failing. I have always felt that our communities lack knowledge and resources in many aspects of life and that is why people tend to make bad decisions or discriminate against others. I feel like it is my purpose to deliver that knowledge to the people so that we are all able to live in a safer South Africa and the NGW program has brought back that sense of purpose for me. 

What advice would you give to your 2023 self?

The advice I’d give to my last year self is to stop putting too much pressure on yourself and trust that what you have planned will work out. Even if it isn’t always according to the timeframes that you set.

Be okay with not succeeding in everything you do because that is also a learning opportunity.

You don’t always have to do too much to impress people and that who you are is enough. You’re doing great regardless of how you perceive yourself. Lastly, love yourself, talk to yourself and be okay with being by yourself. Too much of anything can be harmful and so you don’t need to be panicking and overthinking all the time because in the end things are going to come right because you are meant to do great things and you will be something great in the world, it’s only a matter of time.  

THE LEARNING EVALUATION

With the support of the DG Murray Trust, SoHK undertook an evaluation of certain design decisions that needed to be made about the SoHK for Schools programme. This evaluation, carried out in late 2023, informed decisions that the organisation made about the shape of the SoHK for Schools programme in 2024.

EVALUATION QUESTIONS

The evaluation centred around three questions:

1. Does the SoHK for Schools programme work?

Ultimately, this is the pivotal question for the SoHK for Schools programme, interrogating whether SoHK is fulfilling its mission of improving mental and emotional wellbeing of its participants.

2.Which SoHK for Schools delivery model works best?

In 2023, SoHK had several different SoHK for School delivery models in place, with the intention of assessing whether the different models (namely, 1) a new compulsory model for all Grade 9s, held during school hours, 2) a referral/opt-in model, for all grades, held during school hours, and 3) an after-school model) realised similar or different outcomes.

3.Should SoHK continue to mandate therapy for its coaches?

SoHK’s coaches are young individuals who, through their work with SoHK’s participants, have to carry significant emotional weight. This is in addition to the fact that SoHK’s coaches live in similar, or the same, communities, as SoHK’s participants – often communities where conditions are difficult, and exposure to trauma is all-too-common. In order to support SoHK’s coaches, SoHK has provided, and required that the coaches use, trained counsellors.

This question sought to explore whether this mandated therapy model is one that has realised positive consequences for the coaches and for the SoHK for Schools programme.

FINDINGS

1. Does the SoHK for Schools programme work?

The evaluation revealed that the SoHK for Schools programme has quantitatively significant impacts on several aspects of the participants’ mental wellbeing, across models. The quantitative assessment was supported by qualitative data from focus groups and interviews. Overarchingly, the evaluation indicates that participants have a more positive outlook on their lives and their surroundings, and exhibit observable improvements in behaviour, strong indicators of improved mental and emotional wellbeing.

2. Which SoHK for Schools delivery model works best?

The impact of SoHK for Schools was definitely stronger in the new, entire grade, compulsory model. This model had the highest dosage (>90% attendance, against 48% for the opt-in models), exposing participants to more of the SoHK curriculum and coaches. The after-school model was not successful at all – attendance by participants, whose ability to attend was limited by their transport needs, was sufficiently poor that the after-school programme was discontinued in the 3rd term of 2023.

3.Should SoHK continue to mandate therapy for its coaches?

The mandating of therapy helped coaches to overcome their initial reservations about attending therapy, breaking through personal reservations and cultural norms. SoHK’s process, which asking the coaches to engage in written reflections, not only had the benefit of helping the coaches deal with their own trauma, but had the effect of helping the coaches increase their emotional intelligence, with significant implications for their work with the participants in SoHK’s programmes.

Recently the Expresso TV show invited us back. This time we have grown in number of coaches, participants and programmes. We are very honoured and grateful for the opportunity to share what we do. Urshwin and Ntuthu did us all proud!

Watch the full segment by clicking the button below: